Sunday, January 29, 2012
Monday, January 23, 2012
As I’ve aged, I’ve become kinder to myself and less critical of myself. I’ve become my own friend. I have seen too many dear friends leave this world, too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to read, or play on the computer until 2am, or sleep until noon?
I will continue to dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 70′s, 80's and 90s; and, if I, at the same time wish to weep over a lost love, I WILL.
I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body and will dive into the waves if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set. Hey, one day they too will get old!
I know I am sometimes forgetful; but there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And, I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years, my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody’s beloved pet gets hit by a car? But, broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile, and will never know the joy of being imperfect.
I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning grey, you know just around the temples wink-wink, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn gray.
As I get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don’t question myself anymore. I’ve even earned the right to be wrong.
So, to answer my own question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become.
I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been or worrying about what will be.
And, I shall eat dessert every single day (if I feel like it)!
I am just happy being me...