JUDY FROM THE BLOCK

JUDY FROM THE BLOCK

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

MATERNAL INSTINCTS - A GOOD DAY FOR SISSY - OUR FIRST SUMMER WATERMELON

MATERNAL INSTINCTS

I'm not a stupid girl. I definitely knew that the process would be just that...A PROCESS! It's easy to hide your own pain and smile when someone has a new baby, or when someone becomes a new grandparent, or you see a baby here, there and pretty much everywhere, because who doesn't love a baby? It seems like everybody and their brothers, mothers, sisters, cousins, uncles and aunties have kids, but not me...

I have experienced the joy of hearing a doctor say to me, "your pregnant," only to miscarry, not once but twice. The second time I laid on the couch for about 2 months and just cried and cried, didn't want to work, didn't want to talk to anybody, didn't want to see anybody, just watched TV. I really had myself one BIG PITY PARTY! And the funny thing is, not my husband, not my mother, not my sister, not my friends, nobody not one time said to me get up and stop this. They just let me be me. Ultimately, they knew I would "snap back," and I did. Then, at that point, I was pretty sure I didn't want to have any children. I couldn't bear the pain of miscarrying. My husband was always on the stance of if we do, we do...if we don't, we don't! He always knew my own personal health played a role and he was okay either way...

Flash forward 10 years later and along comes a "spider." I call her a spider (I can't use her real name) because the pain she caused me was like you have been bitten by the biggest ugliest spider, only she bit through to my heart which is the hardest part of the body to heal from pain. It seemed all good at first, so I thought. Here was a young pregnant girl who needed us and maybe we needed her. Do I want to raise a child?!? These maternal instincts took over my mind and body. All seemed well, she didn't want to be a mom and I kinda did. For the first time, however, Junebug was skeptic! He's never skeptic. He's a go-for-it, jump your feet in first kinda guy, always sees his glass as half full. If you like it, he LOVES IT! But not soooooo much this time. He actually did foresee what I did not. Now I was questioning myself...hmmmm, was I being stupid, naive? I took the spider to her doctor appointment (she was about 4 months along at that point and we knew already it was a girl). This was my first trip with her to the doctor. When we arrived to the office, her doctor was located in the Muhammad Ali Parkinson's Disease building adjacent to Barrow's Neurological Institute and St. Joesph's Hospital (where I was born). Coincidence that I just lost my mother to Parkinson's Disease? Fate? Her doctor was on the 5th floor. As soon as we stepped off the elevator, my heart stopped beating!! There is a mural directly on the wall as you get off the elevator.  The mural was a faint picture of Muhammad Ali saying, "Parkinson's Disease, We Must Find A Cure." I walked into the doctor office like a blubbering idiot, or so they thought. I knew right then that my mom had brought me here, and this was meant to be!!!




After much ado, I prevailed and won over the hubby too. In the end, it was to be that the spider would go to college on our dime AND we would raise the baby. My husband named her Destini the next week....

Now preparing for Destini!!! Holy crap! We spared no expense. We wanted her to have anything and everything that we could afford and more. We shopped and we shopped and we shopped, until her room was perfect...


When Destini was born, it was a planned birthday. At spiders last appointment, she was so incredibly miserable and the doctor said we can take her now, pick a day. We chose October 3, 2009. Things went so smooth, it was too much like right. In the delivery room was hubby and I, my sister Pam, and my sister in law Yolanda. Spider was texting while pushing (LITERALLY); not real interested in giving birth!!! I know right?  We have pictures of her texting while giving birth, no joke; BUT obviously I cant show them.  Happy Birthday Destini....


It was around day #3 I was beginning to smell a problem, a BIG PROBLEM! I could tell all of a sudden we had a completely different attitude from spider girl. Very resistant, very standoffish, major attitude! I told Junebug that I was scared. We brought Destini home, but by day #11 the spider ripped her away from our lives. No paperwork was signed, there was nothing we could do! She was leaving and taking Destini...


My husband closed up Destini's room. I spent the next 3-1/2 months crying for her.

When Destini was 4 months old, spider shows up AGAIN and was struggling, needed a break.  Everything we knew would happen if she tried it on her own.  We took Destini for a month with the hopes that we would be keeping her FOR GOOD. Our thought process has always been, THIS IS DESTINI'S HOME! As soon as spider got an attitude, she ripped her away again. Destini is now 9 months old and out there living from pillar to post.  I'm going to always believe in my heart that Destini will be home with us one day. We will NEVER give up....






Believe it or not, the second time she took Desi (we call her Desi) away from us, I was expecting it deep down inside. It still hurt, but that spider bite wasn't quite as hard to take this second go-around. Well, at least not for me. I had noooooooo idea, though, that this time Junebug was hurting so badly. His feelings for this little girl had become so intense. He loves her so much and this time HIS heart was way involved.

This time I didn't mourn for her. I decided I was ready to put anything on the line, ANYTHING, to go back to the doctor and have a baby of our own!!! And today, we are full-blown, full-speed ahead in the process of doing everything possible for a successful invitro fertilization. 

Lifestyle change has been the HARDEST part of what this process involves. Not just your body, diet, exercise, etc., but also very much your mindset as well. My doctor said, "you need to rid yourself of mental stresses during this process." That was hard choices. HARDEST OF ALL! Freeing my mind was going to affect others....
Well the romance is definitely gone!! My husband has to watch me pee on a stick before we have sex, that's pretty much a mood kill. Yeah, prolly too much information right? I know it seems like okay why cant we just go straight to invitro? I didn't understand all the in-betweens. Well the in-betweens are really important to successful invitro, and timing, timing, timing is everything with ovulation! Suck it up men, my poor husband has had to listen to words he never imagined in his wildest dreams. In his neighborhood in Pasadena, where he comes from, girls got pregnant on accident, NOT on purpose! He never imagined he would be sitting in a waiting room at the infertility doctor's office trying to create a life.  LUV YA HONEY ♥ 

A GOOD DAY FOR SISSY

My sister got a huge surprise last week! Her and some of her other office staff were treated to a day at the Arizona Diamondbacks game. Luxury box, catered, et al. My sister loves her Diamondbacks. Her and my mom shared that real passion. We are all fans, but her and mom had a special place for the Diamondbacks. Mom loved to go to the games with her and my brother-in-law. Mom was a major Randy Johnson fan. My sister was a major Luis "Gonzo" Gonzalez fan. When they won the World Series, my sister and my mom bought everything in the stores that said Arizona Diamondbacks on it. My sister was Gonzo'd down!!! Even after he left Arizona, she followed him everywhere (not stalking type behavior mind you). Well.....at the game last week, WHAT A SURPRISE FOR HER.....Can u tell she's nervous?






OUR FIRST WATERMELON THIS SEASON
I stink at buying watermelons, but when I can drag hubby to the grocery store with me....he's got that special "knock" on the watermelon and picks a goodie every time.  This was our first this summer and he did a great job again.....it tastes sooooooooo sweet.  Hopefully I can stick to the fruit this summer and not so much sugary sweets.  NOT GONNA BE EASY!

Saturday, June 26, 2010

THE LEMON BANDIT - FACEBOOK - SPAGHETTI DINNER - DING DONG DITCH EM

THE LEMON BANDIT MY HUSBAND!!! How do I convince him that it's stealing?? He seems to think if it's out in the open public, then it's just a free-for-all, willy-nilly! I cannot seem to make him understand the concept. I've tried going to the store and just buying him his own darn lemons. I've tried scaring him with the possibility of getting hurt or someone calling the police on him (he doesn't intimidate easily)...

With his work, he's on the road all day valleywide. When he gets to a customer's home, ohhhhh Lord don't let them have a LEMON TREE! He is not even remotely embarassed or ashamed to ask for their lemons. People naturally allow him to have as many as he can pick, no problem. BUT.....after he leaves the customer's home and has some "time to kill" in-between jobs, he will drive up and down the street looking for lemon trees in people's yards....BIG PROBLEM! He just starts picking lemons off people's trees!! That's stealing! Here's this big intimidating-lookin muther fella in your yard helping himself to YOUR lemons. He refuses to stop!
Now, in his defense, his homemade lemonade is to die for. I seriously think he could bottle this stuff....and I mean come on, it's just water, lemons and sugar! He's got mad lemonade skills!!
I am asking you all my friends and family, please don't shoot my husband or call the police if you see him sneaking under your lemon tree. He really is harmless. FYI, your grapefruits are safe...



FACEBOOK
What the what? That's what I said about a year ago when someone mentioned Facebook to me. Sounded boring, no thanks. My friend had a Facebook page and she said just look at my page and then decide, don't be such a naysayer. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
OMGootness!!! Once was all it took!! I signed on that day and haven't signed off since. The first person to find me was a friend from elementary school, Karen. I lit up like a Xmas tree. I thought, this is absolutely unbelievable. Then more friend requests, then more friend requests, now family is poppin up too....The "OH MY GOD I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN FOREVER" type reactions. Then, before I know it, I'm joining the mafia, became a fish trader, a Family Feud-a-holic, and someone is sending me a round of drinks and a big fat hug all in the same day....old friends just keep comin and comin, and family members just keep comin and comin, and then NEW friends of OLD friends start comin and comin, and so on and so on and so on. Six degrees of separation for realzzzzzz....
But, in all seriousness, every single person on my FB means something so special to me. Somehow you touched my life along the way or were meant to be part of my future, and THIS higher spirt of FB brought us together. FB makes you feel young again. Is that the right description? Do you get that feeling? It's a feeling of "pride" in a sense just to know that someone cared enough about you to want to continue to know how am I, how is my life, did your dreams come true, and YES, even the trials and tribulations, the unfortunates of heartache and sadness that we too endured along the way. Some of us see each other all the time, some of us we NEVER see. It doesn't even matter though. Thanks to FB and this virtual world, we get to "be there" for each other every single day and enjoy the rest of our lives together....I LOVE YOU FACEBOOK♥


MOM'S SPAGHETTI WITH A JUDY TWIST AND A SIMPLE DESSERT
I know everybody thinks their spaghetti sauce is the BEST. So I won't use that word, but it's rootin-tootin. Fair to say?

Spaghetti:
1 lb lean ground
1 can tomato sauce
1 can stewed tomato
1 can of tomato paste
1 clove (or 2) of garlic
1 large onion
a couple of basil leaves
dash of salt
fresh ground pepper
pinch of sugar
1/2 tsp garlic salt (more or less depending on your taste)
parmigiano-reggiano (optional)
spaghetti

Saute your onions and garlic in a smidge of olive oil, add ground beef, salt, pepper. Cook until meat done. Add in your can tomato products. The tomato paste will require addition of water to your sauce, thicken as you like, or less thick if you like. Remember your sauce will cook for about 2 hrs and will thicken along the way, so you want to go back and check the consistency of your sauce on a regular basis to add more water if needed. Add garlic salt, pinch of sugar. Take your own taste test. Spaghetti sauce can be deceiving...the longer it cooks the flavors completely change from when you first started your sauce. So, eyeball it. Turn on low as possible, cover and let simmer for 2 hours; again, a lot of taste testing along the way.

Boil spaghetti.

Add spaghetti to your sauce. Right before serving, take your basil leaves and slice them into ribbons. Add some of your basil ribbons and fresh grated cheese on top....DIG IN! Let me know what ya think, cuz sometimes I wonder if it's really just that 50+ year old well-seasoned cast iron skillet my mother handed down to me that gives it that extra flava...ENJOY!



The dessert was a quick cake recipe on the back of a Bisquick box when I was a kid. They don't print it on their boxes anymore...but, fortunately, it was so easy to remember since I watched mom make them a lot! Simple ingredients in your pantry for a delicious little dessert. And quick!

Cake:
2 cups Bisquick
1/2 cup sugar (it's not meant to be a super sweet cake)
1 cup milk
1 egg

First, preheat your oven to 375 degrees. Get your round 9 x 1/2 inch pan ready by greasing and light flouring. Square pan is fine too!

In a bowl, mix all the above ingredients and spread in the pan. Pop it in the oven for about 25-30 minutes, the top and edges will brown, stick a toothpick in the center and check it out. A cornbread type texture is what you are looking for. It won't look perfect, it doesn't have to. It will have some cracks on the top, that's okay that chocolate sauce will fill those cracks...

A simple chocolate sauce:
3/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup hershey cocoa
1/3 cup butter
6 oz evaporated milk (half a can)
1 tsp vanilla
In a saucepan, mix sugar and cocoa...blend in milk, stirring constantly until boils (about medium heat). After boil, remove from stove and add butter and vanilla, stir.
Cut a piece of cake and add the "hot" chocolate sauce over the top. CHOCOLATE DELICIOSO! Leftover chocolate sauce goes great over vanilla ice cream too!!!!


DING DONG DITCH EM
We have the silliest cat. About a year ago, one of our cats decided she was slick and if a door is open, ANY DOOR, for any reason, she will dart right outside. If you try to chase her, fuhgitt aboudittt. My first thought was, "what if she can't find her way back home or something happens to her!" I was so worried. Well, about 20 minutes later we get a knock at the door. I go to the door, nobody is there. I know I swear I heard someone knocking on the screen door. Oh well, maybe not. Closed the door, headed back down the hallway. Bang, bang, bang. Ok, I know I heard that! Answered the door, NO ONE IS THERE! I am looking all around, I go outside, look around the house. DAMN KIDS I thought to myself. They are playing ding dong ditch em!
A few minutes later. Bang, bang, bang! Ok, I'm gonna catch me some kids! Ha Ha it was funny at first, but I got things to do now and it's becoming annoying. I fling open the door, NOBODY! I just stood there looking completely stooooopid! Then I hear a lil whisper of a mew, mew. I hear it but I dont see it. I finally look up on the roof and there is Mini Me, my cat. I thought to myself could she really possibly be knocking on the door and then jumping that high to play a game with me? She can't be that smart! Well, after a few more times of it happening, we discovered in fact she really can play DING DONG DITCH EM...and last night, she got me again! Answered the door, what a shock no one is there. I called out, "Miniiiii Meeeeee," and here comes this lil face, PEEK A BOO...

Saturday, June 19, 2010

REMEMBERING DAD ON FATHER'S DAY


REMEMBERING DAD ON FATHER'S DAY....
JIMMIE LEE ROGERS
Like so many of us, I will be missing my dad this Father's Day. When a girl's daddy dies, there is a hole in her heart that no other man could ever fill. However, although physically erased, their memories and wisdom live on in us FOREVER. The first male role model in our life is our father. My father was by no means without imperfection, but to a daughter...he's just about everything and most perfect in our eyes. Dad is the "Head of the House." Nobody has to tell you that, it's just observation as we grow up. I never wanted for anything. I never had to ask twice. If you wanted it, dad would provide it. Seemed so simple. As an adult, we NOW know the huge sacrifice a father makes to provide for his family.
Here's one of my favorite pics of my dad because IT IS who he was for 40 years, a car dealer...

Over the span of those 40 years, dad went from being a car salesman, to a general manager, to owning his own car lots. Dad was a HELL-A-VA salesman. He had a "hustle mentality," and his car lots thrived! Although mom and dad could have lived in Scottsdale, Arizona or Sun City, Arizona later in life, they just wouldn't move away from the west side of Phoenix. Mom and dad believed wholeheartedly in saving a good dollar, or 2, or 3...

When dad was growing up, he was very poor. He is 1 of 7 children. He lived on a farm in a little town called Dyess, Arkansas. If you have ever seen the movie "Walk the Line," the life story of Johnny Cash, then you HAVE SEEN THE TOWN. My dad went to school with Johnny, played guitar with Johnny, they were school chums. We never got tired of listening to stories about Johnny. I like to think now that dad is up there in heaven "pickin and grinin" with Johnny, just as he would have wanted it...
 My father had his first "stroke" at the age of 40. He REFUSED to stop fighting though. He still managed to continue for years with his business, with a lot of extra help, until his second stroke, then third, then fourth, and he was now paralyzed. He could not even write a check any more. His speech was worse than a child's gibberish. He knew he couldn't beat this one. My dad, however, went on to live for another 15 years with his scooter (we called it his caddie). He was going to be mobile damn it, some how, some way!!! This picture was taken 6 months before he died at the age of 68...
My whole life my dad never called me Judy. He either called me "Jude" or "snoopy" or just "snoop." My dad was a funny, funny, funny guy who loved a good joke and could tell a good joke. You weren't really sure what kinda joke was gonna come out of that mouth sometimes though, so you just braced yourself for just about anything. Mom would get so mad at him....hee hee hee. Although he has told me sooooo many riddles and jokes over the years, there is still that one that a daddy's lil girl just can't never forget...."HEY JUDE, PULL DAD'S FINGER!"
HAPPY FATHER'S DAY DAD!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

WHAT IS IT WITH ME AND DOCTOR CHOICES - SCHWAN'S DELIVERY - A DELICIOUS PHILLY CHEESE STEAK

MY CHOICE OF DOCTORS!
Me and these dang doctors, what is it? My choice of physicians seem questionable, so before you ask me for advice on a great doctor....well, DON'T ASK ME (shaking my head).

Now, this has absolutely nothing to do with the wonderful doctors that I work for, my choice there seems to be A-OKAY...15+ years, so far so good.

Sooooooo, me and doctors....I needed a couple of days to process this and let it sink in before I actually blogged about it. For those of you who live in Arizona and have seen the news, and for those of you who do not live in Arizona but certainly know me and follow along in my life, my fertility doctor has been, shall we say, BUSTED? I am shocked!!!! My GYN infertility specialist has been arrested and charged with sexually assaulting a female patient. I will tell you this, for the most part I see his nurse practitioner when I go, in fact she has performed ALL female exams on me. I really don't know what to say about this, but obviously I will be seeing a new physician. HE'S OUTTA HERE! I feel confident in that facility where I go however, so I will be seeing a different physician there in the practice. I know you are "innocent until proven guilty," and I am certainly wishing the best for him and his family (this man has a newborn himself), but I certainly can in no way eliminate the FACTS we know so far that have come out!

http://www.azcentral.com/news/articles/2010/06/15/20100615phoenix-doctor-arrest-details-abrk.htmlphoenix-doctor-arrest-details-abrk.html010/06/15/20100615phoenix-doctor-arrest-details-abrk.html

After I heard this on the news, it made me think of another experience I had with a "doctor gone bad." That time, it was my dentist!! About 3 years ago, I was having my wisdom teeth pulled. Of course they won't pull all of them at one time so return visits become necessary, which in turn you begin to have quite a little rapport going on with the doctor by now. What a jokester, always made me feel comfortable, laugh, pain free, just couldn't have asked for a better personality in your dentist. Three down and awaiting the last appointment to remove what little bit of wisdom I had left in my head, I was watching the 10 oclock news and I see my dentist's face! He had been shot! OMGravy! Little details to go on, too early, it had just happened. I woke up the next morning with it still so fresh on my mind. With NO morning news update, go figure, I said screw it, I am calling the office. I know the girls there, they will tell me what's going on. Well as the story goes, my dentist it would seem had MAJOR MAJOR anger issues and he liked to throw rocks at the lil old neighbor lady (she was in her 80s) over a dispute of about 4 inches of property line. She got tired of his rock throwing, she went in the house and retrieved her dead husband's shotgun, YES SHOTGUN, and shot him in the groin...layman's terms, THE PEE PEE! He lived, albeit ball-less!! So again, DON'T ask me for advice about doctors....NUF SAID!

SCHWAN'S DELIVERY!
My sister and I have become the Schwan's queens. If you have never ordered from Schwan's, I highly recommend it!! Not only are they convenient, it is really good. All "angus" beef, which I love. Juicy chicken, too. All kinds of veggies, side dishes, breads, pastas, ice cream, desserts,...you name it, they got it! Now this does not mean you NEVER have to get off your butt and go the grocery store, but it certainly "eases" your grocery shopping somewhat. And again, IT'S GOOD STUFF. My husband totally talked me into this, I was such a skeptic. Ohhhh, and they take debit!! Al (our guy) has his little credit card machine that he carries on his hip, with a printer too! Like I said, CONVENIENT...
For me though, it's ALL about convenience of cooking time! Schwan's is a good example of straight from the freezer to the oven, stove, grill, microwave. I don't cook Schwan's foods every day, but probably at least twice a week I do. I have a deep freezer on my back patio (as does my sister). I LU LU LUV MY DEEP FREEZER! Schwan's delivers every 2 weeks, so needless to say my sister and I stay "stocked."
PHILLY'S♥♥
I have a dawishous recipe for you using some of Schwan's products. It's easy peazy, lemon squeezy AND your family will eat it up!
This makes 3 foot long subs: 1 green pepper (thinly sliced), 1 purple onion (thinly sliced), 1 box of Schwan's package of philly beef, 3 baguette rolls from Schwan's (you can use whatever bread you prefer, but the baguette holds up the best), salt, pepper, oregano flakes, olive oil, mozzarella cheese (or whatever cheese you prefer, provolone and even parmesan are also good).
Saute your sliced green pepper and onion with a little olive oil until they are "wilted." Remove from pan and set aside.... Same pan, add a little more olive oil. Take your frozen philly steak and cook on each side for about 2 minutes....
THIS IS WHERE THE MAGIC BEGINS.....As you can see, the philly steak begins to break or "shred" on its own!!! Takes a total of about 5-6 minutes to cook the meat all the way through...now add back in your sauteed peppers and onions
Preheat your oven to 375. I like to spread a thin layer of butter on the top of my baguette breads, great flavor! Bake your loaves for about 10 minutes if they have been sitting out for awhile, or 15-20 minutes if still completely frozen. They are already pre-cooked!! After bread is done, slice each loaf down the middle and filler' up with your steak. Add cheese on top (again, whateva kind u like) and pop back in the oven for 3-5 minutes, or until cheese is melted. Serving them hot is BEST!


Wednesday, June 9, 2010

INTERRACIAL MARRIAGE - A DUMB FLY VERSUS A SMART FLY

GUESS WHO'S COMING TO DINNER?
Interracial marriages. Yep, that's what they call us, statistically speaking! My husband is African American and I am Caucasian. I myself have been in prior interracial relationships before meeting my husband, in fact my prior marriage was also to an African American. So, just call me established since the 1980s...

My parents were born and raised in Arkansas in the 1930s, deep in the south. My father joined the Navy when he was 18 and was stationed in San Diego. What a "culture shock" for him!! There were different color skinned people in San Diego!! My dad didn't get to see much of that back home.  But my father, being "Mr. Personality" that he is, quickly made friends and soon learned that he had been "misled" back in the south.

My dad made plans to go home to marry my mom, but unfortunately he would be spending all of his money for the trip home. He didn't have no wedding rings for mom :( My dad told his commanding officer he was going home to marry his sweetheart, but without rings, and after his commanding officer now learning that my dad didn't have a wedding ring, took my dad to the local jeweler and cosigned for my dad to buy rings for my mom. He also arranged for my mom and dad to have an apartment in the building where he and his wife lived so "the wives" would not be lonely and my mom would feel like she already had a friend. That man, was a black man. I will never forget my dad telling me that story. He had NEVER had someone be more kind to him in his life who wasn't family. Dad could not even imagine what his life would have been like had he stayed in Arkansas on the farm and not found ALL this knowledge and different cultures that he was embracing. I was blessed to be in a family that were more open-minded than most.

Ultimately, in 1963, my parents settled down in Phoenix, Arizona, right here at this very home I live in today. Growing up in my neighborhood consisted of all races and religions. As kids, you just get up and play together, different skin colors is NEVER even a topic. You know the old saying though, "it just takes one in the bunch to screw it up for everybody?" Well, that's what happened to me....I won't say a specific name, but someone said the "N" word to me when I was 13 years old. I somehow knew it meant something derogatory, just by the way it was said. The next day I asked my mom, in front of a lot of family mind you, what that word meant. My mom politely excused her and I from the room and quickly exited me down the hallway into a bedroom with door closing behind us. I thought I was in sooo much trouble. My mom asked me where I heard that word. I told her. She adamantly, vehemently expressed to me that I was to NEVER NEVER repeat that out of my mouth ever again in my life. No questions asked. When mom says it...NUF SAID!

So when I began dating "out of my race," I was perhaps a little naive. I say naive because I think my parents sheltered me from racism so much that I didn't know what to expect. As I said, my first husband was also African American. I have certainly seen society "change" or be more "accepting" since then, or have I? Back in the 1980s, I encountered a lot of racism. From both sides! I remember my very first encounter. A white woman approached me at the grocery store while I was shopping with my first husband and saying, "what are you doing, don't touch him, you will burn in hell!" I was speechless! We simply walked way. After that day, I had my guard up! A lot of little unpleasant stories like that here and there throughout my life, you can imagine. I too have experienced being the ONLY white person in a huge church in South Central Los Angeles at a funeral with my in-laws, where ALL FOCUS WAS ON THE WHITE GIRL and not so much the dead person in the casket anymore.  I was called a "wind-blown girl," amongst other things. My mom gave me the best piece of advice after that trip. She said, "Judy, marriage is hard enough, don't let society make it harder."

NO!! RACE WAS NOT THE REASON FOR OUR DIVORCE!

I met my current husband in 1997. Believe it or not, our first date, YES our FIRST date, was to a family function at his mother's home. He assured me and reassured me there was no racism in his family, his mother's boyfriend was a white man, his sister was dating a white man, his brother's girlfriend was an Indian girl, and just what a big interracial family that he had. True enough! He was right! I felt very comfortable right away. I, however, later learned about hypocrisy :((((( I'll save that for later, but yeah I got robbed with in-laws again!

Married, interracially. What does that really mean? I understand that are skin colors are different, but were all just HUMAN BEINGS. "Visual effect," in a sense, is our first emotion when we meet someone. Never take for granted that your happiness might just be sitting behind the eyes of someone whom you overlooked because of the color of their skin. You will have robbed yourself. Don't fear the unknown, embrace it. We laugh, we cry, we agree, we disagree, we fail, we succeed, we give, we take...but at the end of the day, IT'S JUST MARRIAGE...

FLYS, FLYS, FLYS
Last night, he just wouldn't stop! He was buzzing me and buzzing me, kept doin the old "fly by" and buzz right in front of me, but quick enough to get away from me when I would swat at him with my hand. I tried to reason with him and push him outside, he wouldn't compromise. I tried to get one of the cats to chase him, they were too lazy to play (it's only at their discretion and convenience that they chase), soooooo he left me no choice....that's right, I had to go get the fly swatter. After I return with the fly swatter, he sees me, I see him...LETS DO THIS! He lands, I swat, he gets away. He lands, I swat, he gets away. And in-between landing time, he is buzzing me! THE FLIPPIN NERVE OF THIS FLY! I now have discovered he is smarter than the average fly, he actually knows I have this thing in my hand. I put it down and pretend like I'm ignoring him. He continues buzzing all around me, and I know I heard him say, "nany, nany boo-boo you can't catch me." I patiently wait, and I wait, and I wait. He lands on my magazine on my desk and BAAAAM!






YOU CAN'T BEAT ME PUNK...I'M BATMAN!!!